The request to write an article on how a network of inspired local activities can bring about global change has thrown me into the pits of Despair, a despair which is, I am sure, shared by concerned and hurting people the world over.
And that is just what They want: a passive, depressed population who have despaired of having any influence to change how the world is run and who therefore are not going to cause any trouble. Just as an authoritarian parent wants malleable, robotic children to carry out dutifully the Parental Plan.
And that's the first good reason not to give in to political despair but to fight it with all the fierceness we'd muster to counteract a murderous intruder trying to snuff out our life-force. Despair is a dangerous Weapon of Mass Destruction deliberately wielded by our Rulers to keep the status quo chugging along nicely by destroying Hope, Initiative, Creativity and any attempt to organize an environment that is a joy to live in.
Depression is what happens when we only consume and do not create, when we accept the Great Capitalist Con of buying ‘comfort' and ‘security' and give up self-reliance; when we settle for foodshops instead of fields and gardens where we can care for ourselves, when we swallow conventional Approved Medicine and all its dictates instead of finding real healing, when we fall for the massive lie of ‘education' instead of allowing our children true explorative learning, when we accept second-hand Religions instead of finding out for ourselves what we feel about the Universe, when we live in nuclear families instead of communal tribes and in privatized relationships instead of daring to experience real instinctual sexuality; when we use electrical everythings instead of our own muscle-power and bio-energy, when we buy and throw away instead of making and mending; when we switch on mind-numbing canned ‘entertainment' instead of raising our own voices, moving our own limbs, acting in our own theatre, telling each other our own dreams and fantasies.
Around the age of eight, I noted that Everything was Wrong. Not just one or two bits and pieces here and there that needed improvement. No. Everything. So as soon as I could escape my mother's clutches, I determined to create my own world. I started having sex at 14, which is healthy, illegal and causes trouble, so that was obviously a good start. Then at 16, I walked out of Grammar School where I was doing ‘very well' in Their terms (whilst dying of hatred and misery inside). Another good move. Then I joined a planet- and personal-life saving movement, the Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament and spent a decade in intensive direct action politics. And that was another good thing to do.
But then in my mid twenties, I noticed I wanted to die. And my best friend, a German girl of 20, hung herself. Uh-oh, we were not changing the world and ourselves fast enough. So I swerved from going barmy about Vietnam and went into Reichian therapy, became a therapist and in 1970 set up a commune based on free peer-group self-help which we called Atlantis. A community which dived into exploring human nature by removing ourselves from all the usual distractions and rules: we started in a rabbit-warren of a squat in London, moved to a deserted Irish island and then finally to the mountains of Colombia, South America, where we still live. We have been self-sufficient in food for decades, thousands have passed through our doors, our relationships with local people are governed by exchange of goods and services, not by buying and selling, our organic gardening methods are there for all to see. Our animals are happy and loved and we do not eat them. Our children are free, talented and self-governing, politically aware and active, and never went to school. Our influence has spread far and wide, well beyond what might seem possible given the very small number of people who make up the core of our group.
I am 62 and since childhood have never stopped causing trouble, and providing solutions. And encouraging others to do likewise. And yet when faced with the task of writing this article, I fell into the Pit of Despair. Normally in my mountain home, we do not have access to world news, except late and in dribs and drabs. But at present I have come to live on our commune's old sailing ship moored in Ireland, ready to take off on political campaigns around the world. And here I have daily access to news of the horrors being committed in Iraq by our murderously sanctimonious ‘leaders' Messrs. Bush and Blair. It requires superhuman effort not to fall into Despair when confronted with these monsters and the evil system that supports them.
So half a century of constant activity to change the world They were trying to sell me seems like nothing, a mere piss in the wind. Assailed by the same despair millions of us felt over Afghanistan, Vietnam, Chile and all the long list of atrocities Western Man likes to call History. And then the request for two pages on How to Change the World …I shared the request with a woman friend, and quite naturally, we both fell into the Pit of Despair together. Well at least then there was company. That's a good start. She told me of her Despair and I told her she mustn't give in to it, whilst sinking ever deeper into my own. Until this morning, it got so bad I felt no incentive to move at all.
Despair makes you want to curl up and do nothing and die and forget everything, especially articles on How to Change the World. This is a good time to turn oneself into a robotic Soldier of Faith in Humankind and be artificially Courageous. As you can't enjoy doing the things you normally like doing, it's a perfect time to do all those horrible tasks you have been putting off for so long and have a thoroughly and completely miserable time – there is nothing more depressing than trying to feel good when you don't: so in my case, I marched myself off to the computer to complete a long-neglected task of typing up for a friend an old article of mine. And I found it contained some magic words, sent by John Seymour, an organic gardening guru and campaigner:
"I am only one. I can only do what one can do. But what one can do, I will do."
And then my own words followed, written many moons ago, in a similar mood of
despair over the felling of the rainforests and the murder of a friend:
"Staying centred and therefore constructive is a huge part of The Work. Staying
Small is the only way to be effective. If I cripple myself mourning the death
of millions, I can do nothing about the death of one."
Judging by the massive reactions, the slanders, abuse, press campaigns and
direct physical attacks our little community has received over the years from
Western "First Worlders" and their Institutions over such issues as going to
live in the jungle, letting our children be free, not sending them to school,
not adhering to any religion, wearing simple mended clothes, living in simple
shacks, opting out of the rat race in general and out of Europe in particular ….
and by the massively positive reactions of South American peasants and Indians
and middle and upper class people and even soldiers, police and guerrillas, all
of whom, rich or poor, right or left wing still maintain something of the
emotional honesty, mental openness and basic simplicity which "developed"
societies flushed down their barbaric posh contaminating water-closets aeons
ago, … it seems that the most revolutionary and direct way to change the world
is by Living Differently. Now. Break all their rules: talk to each other, cry
together, make a fuss. Don't consume, create. Don't swallow, puke. Don't hide
behind drugs and alcohol: a clean environment starts with your own body. Form
your own communities and self-help groups; make your own mistakes - don't copy
theirs. Drop out of their systems and into your own lives. Break their chains
by breaking your own. Create the world you want to live in, don't just moan at
Them that they haven't created it. Protest, yes, but from the firm basis that
you are already in the process of building the Other World that you know is
possible.
A quote to end with, from Mr. Gandhi:
"It's the action that's important. You have to do the right thing. It may not
be in your power, may not be in your time, that there'll be any fruit. But that
doesn't mean you stop doing the right thing. You may never know what results
come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no results."
With love from Jenny James.
Contactable at: atlantisfoundation@eircom.net